Another funny one from soulsis...

New meds for women

DAMITOL- Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 hours.

EMPTY NESTROGEN- Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.

PEPTOBIMBO - Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.

DUMEROL- When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music.

FLIPITOR- Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

ANTIBOYOTICS- When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up.

MENICILLIN- Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person...can we get naked now?"

BUYAGRA- Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree.

EXTRA STRENGTH BUY-ONE-ALL- When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donny Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura.

JACKASSPIRIN- Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.

ANTITALKSIDENT- A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.

SEXEDRIN- More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome.

RAGAMAT- When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving you the time and trouble of doing it yourself